nlp confidence

How to Unleash a Better Version of You With NLP

Neuro-linguistic Programming or NLP is a set of simple yet powerful techniques that uses language to change a person’s thoughts and behaviors. Since our thoughts and actions make a significant impact on our lives and our decisions, using NLP to enforce changes can potentially improve a person’s personal outlook and professional performance.

The practice has many potentials to change a person’s perceptions in such a way that completely opens them up to attitudes that allow them to adopt practices that improve their lives and unleash a better version of themselves.


Stressful situations become less so if you detach yourself from it. Unfortunately, we can’t just run away from our problems and fears whenever we don’t feel like facing it. NLP teaches you how to mentally dissociate from a stressful situation so that you don’t have to feel too much anxiety while doing what you need to do.

Such situations can vary greatly. It could be the violent butterflies you feel when you approach someone you are attracted to ask for their number or a date. It could be that dreaded speech you are about to give in front of the entire company. You can buffer out any situation that you need to face and cause you anxiety or stress with dissociation.

It’s like floating out of your body and watching yourself from afar. You can even take it further and dissociate from your dissociated self, so you remove yourself further away from the dreaded situation.

nlp uses pressure points for stress relief


Anchoring in NLP is based on the Pavlovian Conditioning method, where the famous psychologist anchored the expectation of food and feeling of hunger to the sound of a ringing bell. Although Pavlov did this experiment with dogs, it is parallel enough in the human experience.

You don’t really need a bell to exercise anchoring. You can anchor the positive feelings of calmness, happiness, or confidence with simple actions and sensations such as pinching an earlobe, pressing a spot on your head, or pulling a finger. Once you have anchored a feeling to a deed, you can feel these feelings at will. 

Anchoring is useful for situations where an instant change of mood is what you need. Imagine being able to will yourself to become confident the second you need to step on stage, or to snap into an instant state of calm and relaxation after a long day at work.


Sometimes, some situations do not necessarily call for action but remain as a source of despair. Reframing the situation is an excellent coping mechanism that allows you to see the better side of things when you are out of options. The only thing you can control in these types of situations are your thoughts and feelings. 

One example is being laid off from your job. Instead of wallowing in despair over losing your only source of income, you can reframe the situation to make it appear positive and hopeful. You can see it as an opportunity to finally make more time for your family, pursue your passions, and put up your dream business. If you see things from that perspective, losing the job is not such a bad thing.

nlp promotes mirroring

Reciprocal relationships

Getting people to like you may sound like a long and tricky process, but NLP has the easiest trick in the bookmirroring. Getting someone you like to reciprocate your amicable feelings is as simple as doing what they do. Smile when they smile, cross your leg when they cross theirs, lean forward when they do. Just make sure not to make it too visible.

People naturally like people who are like them. The fastest and most straightforward way to show them that you are just like them is to do what they do. This builds an instantly powerful initial connection. The trick in making this work is to make it look as natural as possible. Once you make it too obvious that you are copying them, the connection also instantly breaks.

Influence and persuasion

The idea of Conversational Hypnosis where a person can easily be swayed and hypnotized during a normal conversation can sound quite terrifying and controversial. However, it is a somewhat more ethical and beneficial way to use hypnosis to ethically persuade and influence another person. In fact, you can use this technique to improve another person’s self-confidence, resolve conflict, and talk someone out of their fears. It’s actually quite useful!


NLP operates with the belief that each person has a preferred sensory modality such as hearing, sight, or feeling. This preferred modality, otherwise known as the preferred representational system or PRS, can be a significant factor in how practitioners carry out a person’s NLP sessions. Neuro-linguistic programming in itself is like the brain’s user manual or visual map. It enables the practitioner to navigate through a person’s thoughts and influence it in such a way that changes a person’s perspective and reality.


To learn more about neuro-linguistic programming, take the NLP: The Ultimate Guide To Neuro Linguistic Programming online course.

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